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That awkward moment when you walk past a sex shop in NOLA with your campus minister and you friend keeps asking “what’s in there? It’s dark, but what do they sell??”
I just realized that “pun intended” is a pun on “unintended” and I’m literally about to gouge my eyes out I’m so angry
This. Changes. Everything.
I am a team player.
the article just got better as i kept on reading
Dear Darla and Jon:
For Pike The Polar Bear’s 30th birthday, the San Francisco Zoo brought in some snow. You could say she was pretty excited about it.
This should be a top news story.
SO THIS GUY IN MY ENGLISH IS DOING A PROJECT FOR BIO WHERE HE GETS A DUCKLING TO IMPRINT ON HIM SO HE JUST CARRIES IT AROUND WITH HIM TO ALL OF HIS CLASSES AND I SWEAR THIS DUCK IS THE MOST WELL BEHAVED FUCKING POULTRY IVE EVER SEEN IT JUST SITS ON HIS DESK QUIETLY AND SOMETIMES HE PUTS IT IN HIS POCKET AND IT JUST SLEEPS LIKE WOW YOU GO DUCKY
do you ever look around at the big crowds of people around you and realize everyone has a story and memories and family and troubles and achievements and a first kiss and a broken heart but you’ll never know any of it and every human life is really intricate and expansive but oh they’ve walked into a shop and you’ll never see them again and you’ll never know just what they were thinking
Like you can boss me around in sexual situations but you better not try to tell me what to do in regular life
I’m one of those people that you have to keep your eye on or I’ll wander off into the woods and forget to come back.
— Jack White
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